It's March 19. Tuesday of my spring break. I am sitting here outside enjoying this sunny warm, 75 degree day in AZ. It kinda makes me wonder how I could go back to a place where snow is still falling and I would be bundled up in a jacket drinking hot cocoa. I should be working on my National Board writing, but just like many days before this one, I find my mind wondering to different thoughts.
Ok, that's not why I decided to start a blog today. Yesterday, as I woke up at 2:35 am coughing because I finally got a cold (I had told myself I was one of the lucky ones not to get sick this year...), I started thinking about how this week was the beginning of a new journey for Greg and me. I thought about how I have been feeling the last 19 months, how at times I felt alone or that the only person I could turn to was Greg, but at times I didn't want to burden him with my sorrow because perhaps at times, he too was feeling this way, but was being strong for me. It's not that I couldn't talk to others, but who really wants to listen to poor Terra again... You have to get sick of hearing about it again! I thought how maybe there were other people, friends, family, acquaintances, anyone who might be feeling or have felt similar to me. Maybe it was time for me to share what we have been going through because it may be helpful to someone else who has or is in our same shoes. I don't want to make people feel bad for us or treat us differently. I just want it off my shoulders, no more poor me, why me, it isn't fair! Just our thoughts. Read if you want, if not, that's ok too.
My original intentions when I wanted to start a blog were to write about our journey becoming parents. I could have this 'hidden' blog for the first 3 months and then SURPRISE we are pregnant! Since we live so far from family it would be a great way for them to follow those first 3 critical months where you are told not to tell you are pregnant just in case something happens.
Well that's not what I am here to write about...yet :) Instead I am still going to tell you our journey as we TRY to become parents. It has been a tough road so far and I am sure there will be more ups and downs ahead, but getting my thoughts down might make it a little easier. Maybe not. I don't know, but I have faith that everything happens for a reason.
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